Thursday, December 22, 2005

8/6/2005, a day I’ll never forget in my life.

Not knowing what to expect or how it would feel like, I went through the gate (gate 56 in Detroit airport) to the royal Jordanian flight to Amman. As soon as I got to my seat, my heart was pounding. I kept calming myself down that I'm not in Amman yet, but somehow, I felt as if the plane was an extension of mother land, my beloved Jordan.

I sat down, and closed my eyes because I sensed a moment of sadness and was worried that someone may see a teardrop here or there coming of a bald headed middle aged man. I started imagining who's gonna be in the airport waiting for me. Heart started pounding faster, and I knew that I wouldn't be able to resist my tears. I then calmed myself down, especially after this man sat next to me in the flight. He was a Jordanian who is studying in the states, maybe 28 or 30 doing his Ph.D. in industrial engineering.

The plane moved and the captain (3reegat was his name) informed us about the take off procedure and conditions.The plane speeds up and suddenly, I was on the air on my way home. Home, sweet home, ya tora what does it look like these days? Will I see my family very soon? well, it looks like it anyway, so calm down bo3bo3, calm down, only 12 hours that separate you from where your heart and soul are eager to be in peace.I couldn't sleep in the plane, while the man next to me slept like a baby, lucky him, he visits jordan yearly, so he doesn't have that anticipation that I'm feeling.Two seats away, this woman who is trying to comfort her baby, who kept crying. I felt bad for her. There was a kid (maybe 2 or 3 years old) who kept playing around, and the "modeefeh" begged him to move and sit down. The mother didn't like it, thinking that she owns the plane. Boy on a normal situation, I would thought of breaking the window and throw him and his mom off the plane, but today was a special day in bo3bo3's life. So no evil thoughts or wicked feelings are to be thought about today.

Then I saw the shorelines of Palestine, and my heart pounded faster. I could see cities and villages. Then the Dead Sea appeared and with it, my body had goosebumps and my heart felt as it was beating so slowly that I panicked. The plane is descending and I see the airport. We landed. I quickly covered my face because I was feeling a joy I never felt before for a long time. People rushed to get out, and I waited. My legs were shaking.Then I got out.

For the first time in 5 years, I am walking on a Jordanian soil. I walked faster and faster. I starred at every face I saw, I was just happy. Then got to the money exchange booth and got my visa. I sat down underneath a sign that said "No smoking" and started smoking. Heck, three other guys (airport workers) were also smoking in the same area.I then went to get my luggage. An airport worker tried to steal my laptop, but I caught him. He looked at me as if there was nothing wrong, and moved on his way. I got the luggage, and went straight to customs."fee ma3ak eshi yetjamrak" a dude asked me and I replied "no". He then said "tfaddal akhooy".

Then I saw my dad. The old man waived both his hands to me and I smiled back. I worked so hard to overcome the tears in my eyes, last thing I want is him seeing me crying. I then saw my wife and my son. Suddenly, I felt in heaven. Dad, wife, and son all at once? If Mom were there, it would've been the real heaven.Hugged my dad, then wife, and held junior. He started speaking Arabic to me and I was even more joyful.

On the road, dad was giving me a tour of "share3 elma6ar". There is gasr elsnoober. There is that big house on top of the hill that dad says it was transformed to like a restaurant or something. I see people on the sides of the road selling figs, grapes, and watermelon. There on the left side a ra3i with his sheep. I had a big smile on my face, while my heart was crying so hard. I just didn't believe what I'm seeing. Is it really me in Amman? I mean wow, finally, I’m in Amman?

A dear friend of mine once told me that "wa6an is where your family is" I disagree with her 100%. You can take family anywhere in the world, but can you take what composes a wa6an? bayya3 elteen is part of that wa6an. bayya3 elba66eekh is too. Elkashrah is essential. the falafel, shawarma, ro3yan elghanam, zamameer elseyyarat, and many many more things that make up this wa6an.Take all those parts, and move them somewhere else, and then, only then, I'll agree that wa6an is movable.

Wa6an, what a sweet word, that we seem to fail to fully understand. It's not the flag or the piece of property you own. Wa6an is a house that is built on so many corners and stones. Take one brick out, and the base of this house will start deteriorating.

8 comments:

Dar said...

I was so much affected ! and i like the way u define homeland :)
Cheerz !

hareega said...

janna janna janna .... alla ya watanna :)

Tololy said...

I totally relate. You pour feelings into your words, Bo3bo3. I felt almost the same things when I was returning home, and I did not come even close to the period you were absent from Jordan. Home is where the heart is.

Bo3Bo3 said...

Dar
Glad that u liked it man.

Abu narah (hareega)
maaaaaaaan, can't wait to go back.

Toloy
True, and if your mind tells u other wise, force your heart to take control.

Luai said...

Very nice. I feel that way everytime I head home to Jordan. Hope you'll be able to make it back regularly in the future.

Bo3Bo3 said...

Luai

Inshalla. I think that the agony of feeling home sick is just a great pain to live through. Makes u love home more

DreamsMaker said...

Man, you just made my tears drop .. Home sweet home, today I coulnd't find any seat to go home and be with family in Adha Eid .. I"m so depressed ..

Arwa said...

So much to say and think of when it comes to defining alwatan, is it where your heart is, where your friends and those you love are, or is it where you can just BE....

I really enjoyed reading your descriptions of Amman.

Arwa