The long waited Battle

Finally…the wait is over. It’s been more than 3 months since I enjoyed a good home cooking mansaf. Today, I announce that I am a happy man. Finally…my wife and mom decided to please me by making me the happiest man alive.

Three months since I sat down face to face with mansaf. Day after day…I hinted and gave signals, but no one was paying attention. But the wait is over, and I stood face to face starring at the mansaf loaded with sweet looking lamb, and pine and almond nuts giving this master piece the greatest work of art.

Face to face..it was a war in which a sole survivor has to emerge. This house was too big for both of us, and one had to go. It was a war of survival, and I fought it well. Slowely, one by one started withdrawing from the battle field. Mom, then wife, and finally my dad withdrew from the field. Suddenly, I saw myself alone with almost half of the big sweet mansaf tray still intact. But it has to go, or else, I will lose the fight. I kept fighting, and taking casualties as I felt my stomach was begging me to stop.

The heat of the battle was burning up. Two big chunks of meat are still trying to fight my trained forces of WFD (weapons of food destruction). With one blow, the first of the remaining meat chunks was annihilated. Then my forward forces isolated and siege the last enemy combatant hiding behind a small hill of rice. My forced advanced and took heavy casualties again, and captured the last enemy combatant. Take no prisoners was the goal of this battle. Dad, Mom, and wife were shocked watching the battle from a distance fearing for their own safety. They called for a cease fire and pledged to the UN community to interfere. But this was the long waited war and the last thing I needed is UN observers. So I finished the enemy..to the last drop of rice and emerged the sole winner of this fierce battle.

Finally…I’m a happy man. I call on all men to withstand their grounds and fight their own battles with a mighty force. Don’t give up your fight. I urge you not to. Long live the revolution and God helps us all.