Saturday, October 21, 2006

Chapters from an immigrant's life, Part XIII, I bought my son

Part XIII. I bought my son

I have a friend..a dear friend of mine. He was married to an American woman. My understanding is that things were going great on their first year of marriage. Then suddenly, things started to turn to ugly. He decided to go for divorce. However…he discovered his wife to be pregnant. So he decided to withstand his life of hell for the sake of his child. I don’t agree with his decision, but it was his life anyway. I felt bad for the guy.

So his son was born. He named him Tariq. Tariq is aa sweet cute looking boy, and honestly, I now understand why he changed his mind regarding divorce. But his life is really a mess. I’m sure he tried to fix matters but seems his wife was unfixable. He used to invite me to his house, and I could see how crazy he was with his son. Such a cute and smart child. But I could also see in his dad’s eyes the sadness that could kill a man. A heavy purdon on his life. I felt bad for the guy.

Tariq is growing fast, and his dad’s misery is growing with it. His wife was not an honest wife. She was bad, and I suspect that she was cheating on her husband. Maybe he knew she was, but couldn’t divorce her for the sake of his son. The things people go through for the sake of children. I don’t know how he could live with her like that. I know that he wanted out so bad, but his son was like the shackles that tied him to such miserable life. I felt bad for the guy.

Tariq was 6 years old now. The father then decided to pursue divorce. He seemed to have enough of such mess. So his wife leaves him and goes to her family’s hone. She takes Tariq with her. The guy kept calling me crying like a baby with so much sadness about his son. I knew this was going to happen to him for I could see the strong relationship with his son. I really felt bad for the guy.

Three months later, the guy is still calling me trying to seek an end to his misery. I kept comforting him to hold on for longer. I wanted to see the guy strong and resisting any calls from his heart to back down and get back with his wife. I gotta be honest, I never imagined him leaving his wife, but he did, and I’m happy for him. He told me how he went to his wife’s home begging to see his son, but she refused. I felt bad for the guy.

A couple of weeks later, he called me again crying for he just heard that his son was in the hospital. I rushed to his side and went with him to the hospital. I now can see Tariq different. Skinny and so slim. He was told that his is going through a physiological shock. He was asking his wife seeking information of what happened. She was as hard as a stone. The FBI is now questioning the couple about the child. The poor man was just sitting with his face so shocked. So they wanted to take Tariq to see a psychiatrist to examine him. Tariq wasn’t saying one word as if he was just pale. He then jumped toward his dad and I couldn’t hold myself from crying and comforting the guy. God I felt for both of them. The wife was in another world.

Later, I was told that the doctor recommended that the son moves with his dad. Then few weeks later, I got a call from my friend wanting to meet me in the coffee shop. I again rushed to meet him for I could do anything for him. As soon as he saw me, he shed a couple of tears and said “I just bought my son”. I was shocked. I said “man are you ok? This is America, no one sells or buys children”. He said “dude..I’m telling you, I just bought my son” So I demanded to know what happened. Well, it seems that my friend offered his ex-wife money to give up custody of the child. She demanded a higher figure and he basically agreed. He showed me the custody papers, and that’s when my heart screamed “God is great” for I felt happy for my friend. I felt great for the guy.

Tariq is now 12 years old, and as cute as he was 7 years ago. Happy with his father, and making his father, the happiest dad alive. That story moved me so much and reminded me with the troubles in ghorbah. The things we do for our children. I am happy to say that Tariq and his father are living a happy life. He got married again, and he has a family now where Tariq is a big part of this family.

To me, seeing Tariq and his dad together, and remembering what his dad went through, makes me smile and believe that God is always there, but we have to wait and be patients. How many men leave their children to the unknown, not caring about what may happen to them? I know of many. But this man kept fighting never losing hope ever. He was willing to give everything he owned, including his life for the sake of his son.

I sometimes wonder if I was that guy, and what would I do, or have done to save my son. Sometimes, it’s hard to make the right decision, or the right decision has a hefty price to pay. This friend of mine held for 6 years living in hell, and finally, God gave him the gift of life. A great family and a great son. God bless us all.


eyad said...

I admire your honesty and courage, and i really learn many things about ghorbeh, thanks indeed

Bo3Bo3 said...

thanks eyad dude...

Anonymous said...

touching story, alot of shit happens to us, and the people
(back home) think we're enjoying every moment of our lives, thanks man.

Bo3Bo3 said...

seems that u too went through similar situation...many do

Anonymous said...

Wallah true man, every day comes with new surprises, and most of them suck

Summer said...

Nice part of your life..i am sure you feel good that your friend turned to you in time of toruble..i am happy for him too to get his son back!!

Hareega said...

Bo3Bo3, I have a couple of questions

1- If your life didn't turn well after some dark years, would you still write down whatever you just wrote? If you were still away from your family and haven't got married and didn't have adegree, would you still write that?

2- IF you return to Jordan, and your son turns 18 and your son was confused about either studying in Jordan or going to America, what would you advise him to do?

Bo3Bo3 said...


I wish i can answer those questions u posted. For the first one, i don't think so for we sometimes need to see light to be able to digest how dark feels like. the second one is very tough to answer. I'll have 2 choices, one is to let him go to states and lecture him about such experience, or option two is to over-protect him and keep him under my wings for I saw what a wrong turn may do.

zaid m said...

yes amjad, it's painful to witnesst. it's happning to a good friend of mine, his whole lif in hold for the last 7 years. the thig is his daughter is so attach to him, and the wife is so ignorant. don't know why some women would do that.